Soup

Soup was a former council member of the Guidan Empire and founder of Comptonia. Soup is considered an “all-mighty being” by many Guidan citizens as he was the first to discover and imperialize the land now known as Comptonia. In addition, Soup has access to powers some may consider unnatural. His last known physical appearance was that of a watermelon man wearing a business suit. Whether or not this is his true form is undecided. His current whereabouts are unknown.

 

Early Life
Soup was born a simple watermelon in the country of Gooberland, grown by a loving farmer. Near the day of Harvest, Compton greeted Soup, blessing him with life. Humanoid legs, arms, and a true head sprouted and he set off to his new life. Compton granted him great powers and wanted only one thing in return. For Soup to spread the word of Compton across the lands.

 

Founding Comptonia
Soup made several friends during his life, including 14Alligators, Gemmacroon, and TheChazz. It was these four individuals that set out to discover new land in the name of Compton. After nearly 14 months on the open ocean, they found land. Unfortunately, they were struck by a horrible storm and washed up on the beach, stranded and without supplies. The four men, quick-witted as ever, gathered resources and established a base. Soup claimed the land in the name of Compton, and it was branded as Comptonia. On this land was built a church, a shrine to Compton, a home for the inhabitants to live, and a great mine. Eventually, one man, known as Dashhunt141, came to settle in Comptonia. He lived in solitude on an island in the bay of Comptonia and began a morally grey sugar farming business. A granite shrine was built by Soup floating near the church of compton. Anti-Comptonite figures, the villagers from nearby towns, used dark, black magic to possess Soup. They used his power to abuse Comptonia, eventually culminating in the Granite Apocalypse. Soup vanished after this event, forcing the people of Comptonia to flee to the land of Old Guido. For years, Soup was gone.

 

Life in Old Guido
Years after 14Alligators, Gemmacroon, and TheChazzz had settled in to Old Guido, Soup returned. The boys had forgotten his face, and thus he was able to disguise himself as a simple immigrant. Claiming to be a simple farmer from the distant land of Gooberland, he set up a dirt hut for him to live in, outside of the bunker. Though curious about his true intentions, the boys decided to ignore him. Right under their noses, Soup was constructing a devious structure. The Crafting Table Hallway. Consisting of nearly 900 crafting tables, this monument was an incredible display of skill by Soup. After discovering this hallway, Soup was recognized as the boys’ old friend, and was granted a position on the council due to his incredible combat skill and silky smooth voice. During this time, Dashhunt141 and Scoutingtn murdered Jerry (by Compton may he rest), and were locked in prison. Soup was the attorney for Dashhunt141, and managed to get him off with a light sentence. Scoutingtn, on the other hand, was banished to the Nether for his crimes. Full of guilt for what happened to the pair, Soup went into hiding for several months. During his absence, the development of Old Guido quickly expanded. After his return, he was shown around the new empire and introduced to the Pillar Men at the heart of Mount Colonoscopy. During a freak accident, he awakened them and indirectly caused the eruption of Mount Colonoscopy, destroying Old Guido and forcing the boys underground. Soup didn’t come with, and was presumed to have been killed in the fires of the eruption.

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Return to Impero di Guido
Nearly 20 years after the eruption that should have killed him, Soup returned to Impero di Guido and was again given a spot on the council. After a brief tour, Soup went to tradition and built a dirt hole for him to live in. In this hole he lived for months, only occasionally coming out to deal with council matters. Eventually, his hole was destroyed by an unknown Anti-Comptonian and forced Soup once more into hiding. It’s been 5 years since that day, and Soup’s whereabouts are still unknown. Many eagerly await his return to Impero di Guido, or the next empire after this.

The Observer
Soup's return has been long predicted. Yet none could ever imagine what he returned as. Soup has returned recently as "Compton's Observer". His appearance is that of a simple watermelon with a large, red eye. His limbs have been replaced by artificial watermelon flesh. His power as of now are unknown, but caution should be exercised. His place on the Council has been restored, but whether this is due to subordination, fear, or some other cause is unknown. Currently, he works in close relation with Dashhunt. The only time he has been seen outside of the far south-western mountains is to purchase a single baked potato from the shop of JT_2316 in Imperium Terrae. His cause for doing such an action is unknown.    

Should He Return
Soup is a powerful being. Despite his known benevolence, the possession of him during the Comptonian era has forever tainted him. Even during his time in Old Guido, he was far less welcoming and happy towards people. Soup’s power must not be understated. Should he return, be it in this kingdom or the next, follow these simple rules and your chance of survival are greatly increased.

 

Do not look into Soups eyes.

 

Do not carry dirt on your person

 

Offer him water

 

Sprinkle nearby, locally sourced dirt over his feet

 

Act as polite as possible

 

Do not speak unless spoken to

 

Do not turn away from Soup

 

D̷o̶ ̷n̷o̸t̷ ̸[̴D̶A̷T̶A̷ ̴E̴X̴P̴U̴N̴G̴E̴D̶]̸

 

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Ř̴̡̨̢̢̢̢̢̧̢̧̡̪͇͈̼̦̗̮̘̖̼̮̦̰͉̦̺̹̮̯̩͙̳͖̹͎̙̺̺̩̬͍̩̖̰͍͇̘̞̰̝͈͖͚̲͕͖̬͇͖͓̼̰̣̥͍̮̯̖͇̮͖͍̟̭̺͙̣͕̦͓̩̰̮̼͌̀̔͗͌̓̊̆̈́͊̿͑̏̽͛̄͑̽̇̅̒̏̒͐͐̐̕͜͜͜͜͝͝͠ͅU̶͚̓̈́̾̌̀̑̐̕N̶̨̨̧̢̛̹͕̠͕̯̭͓͎̟̠̮̮̩̠̠̹̼̻̹͓̻̞̻͓̩̲̮̪͖͇̖̘̯̖̲͙̠̹̦̍̒̑̿́͒̿̾̒̀̏͗̔̃͋̑͑̅̀̉̋̊̑̅̓̃̃̋̀̎̏̔̌͛͋͘̕̚̚͜͠ͅ

 

D̸̤́ŕ̶̦õ̵̲̕b̶̩͔̏̑o̵͓̗͗ ̶̼̾s̵̩͛ç̶̍ ̸̳̰͗x̸̥͍͗ỳ̵̢͜ ̶̼̏͜m̵͍̈́r̷̋͜k̴͎͊̓x̶̢̓́m̶̰̏̚o̷̤̫͋͗ ̷̯̌p̴̞̘̽y̷̺̹̓́b̶̨͒͜ ̵̯̽c̸̢͛e̸̠͌́b̸̡̒̄f̵̙̜̈̉s̵͈̖̏f̴̢̦̿̉k̷̛͇̄v̴̖̲̕̕ ̴̤͝y̷̝͝͠x̸͇̅͂ͅ ̸͇̕͜d̴̟͕̊r̵͍͍̀̃o̶̡̓́ ̴̢̛̈́n̸̠̥̓k̴̮͙̑i̶͙̇ ̸̘̉́Ś̵̯͉ ̴̣͕̎̉b̸͕̉̂ó̷͔d̵̢̳̅͠ẻ̸̼͍̎b̸̞͖͒̂ẍ̸̠́.̸̓͜ ̶̰̗͑̿W̵̛̰̙̆ḱ̶̯͝u̸̢̥̍̈́ò̸͖ ̷̹̘̚d̴̰̔͌r̷̗͎͆̚ō̵̢̭ ̸̫̈͝ẅ̵̻́͛y̵̱͆̈́c̵͖͔͂d̷̘̅ ̸͔̈́͘y̷̮͠p̷͉̅͒ ̶͓̈́̐i̸̻̚y̵̨͖̅̌ẹ̴̽̈b̷̼̭̄̈́ ̸̹͛c̸̼̄ȑ̷̥͊y̴̮̥̍b̵̢̬̌̓d̷͖͕̔ ̸̆͜͝ṽ̶ͅs̶̠͐͗p̸͕̏͑ö̶̢̫͌c̴̰̳̒ ̶̣̊g̵̳̪͠ŕ̴̨̂s̷͛͝ͅv̶͒̓͜o̵̡̠̊c̷̘͌̔ ̷̨̠͑͝i̷̧͘͜y̷̛͓̫͑ḛ̸͓͑͠ ̵̫̭͊k̷͇̫̑̎b̶̧̲̃o̴̻͑ ̴̩͕̓ć̸̢̰ď̷̛͇͚s̷̀̐ͅv̷̦͓̅͝v̸͖͎͠ ̷̤͊m̷̫̿k̶̘̽z̷̩͊ḳ̵̋̈l̵̖͉͝v̶̘̱̈ő̵̗͓̔.̷͈̊̐

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